Common jargon

Some of the terminologies defined, in case not familiar to you.

 FYI, I am not interested in some of these activities*

BDSM: Bondage, Domination, Sadism, Masochism. All inclusive term for activities of B&D, D/s, S&M.

B&D: Bondage and Discipline. A subgroup within D/s is largely involved in making the submissive physically helpless and applying stimuli that outside of a scene would be painful.

Body training: Uses specialized apparatus to 'train' a body part or area to look a certain way for an extended period. Corsets are used to train the waist and lower abdomen to make it smaller. Nipple training devices pull the nipple out from the breast to lengthen it.

Bloodsports:A group of techniques in which the submissive's skin is broken and blood is allowed to escape. The most common blood sport is cutting.*

Bondage: A state of subjection to a force, power, or influence. It comes from the Old English word bonda, which means husbandman (farmer).
A group of techniques for rendering a submissive physically helpless. These include rope ties, handcuffs and manacles, wrapping, and mummification.
Binding can be used for correction, but it is often used for pleasure, depending on the relationship. During bondage, the Master has complete control over the sub, but this depends on the type of binding Each one has its own use and purpose. Regardless of the style of restraint, they should all be somewhat comfortable to wear but restrictive, and should not cut off blood circulation. If the sub is extremely uncomfortable, they will have attention on their body and not fully on the Dom.

Bottom: A taker who versus a giver the Top. Used mostly in gay sex. But also referred to as a submissive in a derogative way.*

Cuffs: Are mainly used for wrist and arm restraint. When referring to leg and ankle restraints, they are normally called shackles. They can be made from many different materials, from nylon with Velcro closings to leather to metal. Care must be taken in using cuffs since a tight fit can cut off circulation. Cuffs can be used to bind the hands to the sub's waist, ankles, thighs, or to other objects. Usually, when hand or thumb cuffs are not used, the cuff is a specialized item that binds an extremity to another object, one or two at a time.

Cum slut: Someone who totally enjoys licking, tasting, and swallowing cum, and desires to have as much as physically possible, through oral sex,  licking off the cum soaked head of the penis after intercourse, or by licking out of another woman's cum filled pussy.

Cutting: A technique in which cuts are carefully made in the submissive's skin to produce an aesthetically pleasing pattern and stimulation to the submissive. The cuts are sometimes made into permanent markings by placing sterile foreign substances in them before they heal.*

Daddy figure: An age play where the sub behaves like a baby, or as a small child. Needs a Daddy figure to look after with pacifiers, feed with bottles, perhaps diapers also as known as an  Authoritative and Deliberate figure.* Not to be confused with a sugar daddy.*

Discipline: The application of stimuli that, outside of a scene, would be considered painful. Can be verbal, but common discipline techniques are physical: whipping, spanking and strapping.

Dominant: Exercising the most influence or control; governing. Most prominent in position. Comes from Old French and Latin dominans, to dominate. An individual who accepts the submissive's power and uses it for their mutual pleasure. Also known as Dom. Domination is not just giving random orders. A good Dom will find a way to cause the sub to desire pleasing the Dom. A Dom, or Dominant, is the protector, mentor, teacher, and lover to the slave. It is about character and personality.

D/s: Discipline and submission, can include all kinds of discipline including bondage, humiliation, and verbal.

Free time: Time out with a limited time period for a slave under 24/7 to pursue her career/work, or to speak freely but still with respect to her Master while still being under his total control. Once the time is up the 24/7 obligations resume.

Gimp: sexual fetishist who likes to be dominated and who dresses in a leather or rubber bodysuit with mask, zips, and chains. Many times just locked in a box for extended periods.*

Golden Showers: A humiliation to some and others enjoy it, a technique where the dominant urinates on/in the submissive. Consumption may be part of this scene.

Humiliation: This is a specific style of domination that centers on making the sub do a particular act, that is embarrassing or repugnant, or just verbal. Examples include making the sub eat from a bowl on the floor, publicly disciplining a sub, and making a sub perform an act in public that could be considered embarrassing. Some forms of excretory play (urine, feces). This can be an effective means of control of the sub. Some actually do enjoy humiliation and derive a great deal of pleasure from such activities as a pet, or receiving golden showers, or just being called a cunt or whore.

Impact play: :is any practice that involves one person receiving impact — for example, being spanked, punched, whipped, or flogged — by another

Masochism: A condition in which sexual excitement and satisfaction depend largely on being subjected to abuse or physical pain, whether by oneself or another. Comes from Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, Austrian novelist (1836-1895). A pain slut would be a very good example of this.

M/s: Master/slave relation is the highest type in the realm of BDSM.

Master: The Master is a higher gradient of control in D/s. The Master follows the same rules as a Dom, but in a stricter sense. The Master can have a slave, but may also call their slave a sub. The slave is owned or "collared" by the Master. The Master considers the slave a possession, but a highly valuable and loved one, the most valuable thing he owns. Offenses against the rules laid out by the Master are dealt with more severely, in most circumstances. Still, the Master, when pleased, flows great love and caring to his slave. The Master is also more protective of his slave because the slave is totally dependent on the Master.

No Limits: A relationship that is agreed to be without limits from the slave's point of view. Most no-limit relationships are found in the Master/slave subgroup. However, even if it is called a No-Limit relationship a Master may impose some limits to events that he may not wish to participate in.

Objectification: treating a person as an object for example a Christmas tree, a vase to hold a flower, furniture as a table, or coat rack.

OTK: Over-the-knee spanking.

Pain slut: Someone who enjoys extreme sadistic activities and derives pleasure from humiliation, pain, and discomfort.

Pet: AKA puppy play, walking on hands and knees nude, with a collar and leash,  barking or fetching, just like a pet dog would. Fake paws can be worn.

Physical Domination: This style of domination includes a wide range of activities, including spanking, whips,  floggers, and other devices or along with restriction. Another style of physical domination includes moving the sub in space without their consent, by the hair, a leash, or a simple hand on the back of the neck. Physical domination is a very direct way of communicating to the sub the position and authority of the Master. Physical domination does not have to be violent or punishing.

Piercing: This is a way of ornamenting the body in other places than the ear with jewelry. Pierced areas can include the nose, eyebrow, lip, and nipples. In females, piercing can include the clitoris, clitoral hood, inner and outer labia.

Ponyplay:  erotic role play where the bottom assumes the role of a horse and becomes a ponygirl (or ponyboy). Either pulling a special cart or a special saddle is attached to her back and ridden by the Top. Involves wearing a fake horsetail from the anus, and may have horseshoe shaped boots.

Restriction: This is a style of domination where the sub is restricted in movement, speech, eye contact, or touching her Master unless permission is granted. Restriction can be enforced with restraining devices, gags, ropes, handcuffs, or merely words. Restricting the movement of a sub is a widely used training technique.

Sadism: The perversion of deriving sexual satisfaction from the infliction of pain on others. Delight in cruelty. Extreme cruelty. Comes from the French Marquis de Sade (1740-1814).

Sadist: An individual who enjoys causing pain and receives pleasure from the suffering of others.

S&M: Sadism and Masochism; The act (by some refereed as perversion) of taking pleasure, especially sexual gratification from simultaneous sadism and masochism. Since this sounds too harsh to some, it may be preferred to Sexual Magic. A term often used to describe the D/s scene; however, it is falling into disrepute because it is both inaccurate (Masters/Dominants are not sadists.) and overly limited (All slaves/submissives are not masochists.). S&M  may be referred to as the Slave-Master relationship.

Safeword: A word or phrase which permits the submissive to withdraw consent and terminate the scene at any point without endangering the illusion that the dominant is in complete control.

Scat: A slang term for scatophilia, taking pleasure in playing with and sometimes eating feces. While this is occasionally used as a means of humiliation, it presents a relatively severe health risk, not limited to AIDS and hepatitis.*

SAM: Smart Arsed Masochist. A pseudo submissive who attempts to control everything the dominant does. A term of contempt. See Topping From the Bottom.*

Scene (The): The activities associated with BDSM and people considered as a whole.
Scene (A): An individual play session of whatever duration where the participants are in their D/s roles.

Slave: Often used interchangeably and wrongly with submissive. However, generally reflects a more intense level of submission or non-sexual or sexual-plus submission. Furthermore, the slave gives up all of her rights, limits, and control of herself to her master, and accepts limits and rights set by her Master. For example, a slave might be someone who remains in a 24-hour-per-day submission and cooks, cleans, and, otherwise, takes care of a dominant's house. A slave is on a higher level of servitude and a more valuable asset than a submissive role. See table of submissive levels.

SSC: Sane, Safe, Consensual. Just as the term applies all activities should follow this credo. Make sure your Master is sane and responsible. Practices safety with you, and does not put your life in jeopardy. All activities are agreed upon in advance, and as per the written contract. No actual injury should occur to the sub.

Submissive: Comes from Submit. An individual who gives up power in a D/s or M/s relationship for the mutual pleasure of those involved.  The role of the submissive appears to be somewhat simpler, but in actuality, the sub plays a large role in shaping the D/s relationship but not in an M/s type. The sub's primary role is to follow her Dom's or Master's directions and to please. Being submissive does not mean that the sub is a doormat.  See the different levels of submissives at the end of this. It is important to realize what level you are at.

Submit: To yield or surrender (oneself) to the will or authority of another. To subject to a condition or process. To yield to the opinion or authority of another; give in. To allow oneself to be subjected; acquiesce. Comes from Middle English submitten, Latin submittere, to set under: sub-under + mittere-to cause.

Switch: A person who enjoys both the dominant and submissive roles. A switch may be dominant to one person and submissive with another or maybe dominant or submissive with the same person at different times.*

Toilet slave: as the name suggests used as a toilet for urine and scat which they are to ingest. Extremely dangerous when scat is consumed. The ultimate humiliation and turning someone into a sub-human. Not the same as Golden shower.*

TPE: Total Power Exchange, when the slave surrenders her mind and body, including all of her self-control and power to her Master. This is usually done in a 24 hours, 7 days a week, live-in relationship. However, it is rarely true 24/7 unless the Master can stay with his slave non-stop 24 hours every day of the week, month, and year. Limits and safewords still apply, ensuring both parties experience pleasure, but there are fewer limits overall, and the trust between the Master and his slave is deeper.

Top: A Dominant, or Master.

Topping from the bottom: For a submissive to dictate the precise action in a scene. A term of contempt.

TT: Tit torture.

24/7: Control of the slave who remains in a 24-hour-per-day submission, 7 days a week.

Vanilla: Not in the scene. A term used to describe ordinary, conventional life both sexual and otherwise.

Verbal Domination: Verbal domination is control using words and speech to effect a change in the slave.  Calling the slave" slave" or being called a "Master" in a public place is considered verbal domination.  In the case of cyber or long-distance D/s, exercised on the phone, email Skype, etc via computer, this is the style used by most Masters, since they are not there to correct or reward the slave physically. It is very difficult to physically dominate a slave over a long-distance connection. The slave must do what the Master orders, to the best of the sub's ability. If toys, vibrators are to be applied, the slave must be able to physically do the action. Since the physical control of the slave is difficult to ensure, verbal domination is used extensively.

Wax: This is utilized by many couples for enhancing their play. Candle wax dripped onto sensitive body areas, such as the nipples, chest, or groin can be intensely stimulating for couples who have a greater pain tolerance. The sensation of the hot wax, running down and hardening into a semi-soft shell can be very erotic. The heat from the wax also serves to intensify the sensitivity in and around the area if the wax is not too hot.

By all means, there are a lot more definitions if you do not understand something you are free to ask or just look it up on the internet which may not necessarily be my own interpretation. In our relationship, we define many aspects not necessarily practiced by the BDSM community at large.